I'm forever blowing bubbles, red bubbles, 'cause I'm hooked on codeine!

Now that I've got that out of my system, it's time to discuss something very near and dear to me. No, not her, she's not NEAR you STUPID TARD.

I'm talking about dreams! No, not the, "I have a dream" "what do you want to be when you grow up (a fireman!)" type dreams. I mean the psychic phenomena most non-freakish people go through when they sleep.

If you have any intention of being considered a creative person, you should be able to dream. I've heard of people who say they don't dream or they very rarely dream. First of all, that's bona fide bullshit because everyone dreams, but not everyone remembers those dreams. So then I should check myself and say that in order to be considered a creative person, you have to be able to REMEMBER what you dreamt about. Preferably not using that "dream journal" shit.

Dreams are the best. Even the nightmarish ones because a) it's not real, stop being a baby) and b) well, I guess there is no b). So in that sense, nightmares are like Pirates of the Caribbean, the ride. (The movies are actually too terrible to be considered fun, even after the fact.)

The coolest things about dreams is that they inspire neat ideas for stories. So if you want to write, I can't imagine not being able to dream. True, you can cognate story ideas when you're awake, but I find that dreams are best able to get your mind to consider situations that you couldn't have come up with yourself.

Scientists don't know what dreams are, exactly, which is neat because it's a MYSTERY. So that means until some brainiac comes up with the answer, they can be whatever we want them to be. So I say that dreams are really nothing more than images from your subconscious bubbling to the surface. They only have limited meaning, and the meaning is usually obvious. Pour example: if you dream of being chased by something, that usually means you're afraid of that something (or whatever you think it represents). It's very easy shit and that's how I wanna keep it.

I rarely have recurring dreams per se, but I do have recurring themes.

1) I'm running, running, running, but I'm not going anywhere. You ever have this? It's like lagging in your dreams. Maybe my equipment is defective. It's annoying and strange, but I understand that lots of people have dreams of running (either from something or towards something) and not going anywhere. Maybe some assholes should just get the fuck out of the dreamscape and stop lagging shit up! WHAT'RE YOU DREAMING IN 9600 BAUD? HOLY SHIT DROP THIS FAGGOT LAGGER. PP MORE YOU BITCH.

2) THE DOOM DREAMS. Ah yes, Doom has so thoroughly penetrated by subconscious that I literally have dreams where I am in Doom. I still haven't figured out if I'm dreaming of myself playing a game of Doom, or if I'm literally in a Doom game. It's an extremely tricky predicament that I can't fully explain here. Suffice to say, these dreams are always a hoot because no matter how many times I stare down Cyberdemons or Barons of Hell or, worst of all, fucking PAIN FUCKING ELEMENTALS, I can cheat my way out of the situation. If only IDDQD worked in other dreams, though...

Oh wait, that reminds me of another recurring dream element: 3) Jumping over fences. Usually when I'm dreaming of being chased by someone/something, it takes place in a suburban setting. HMMM, I WONDER IF THAT MEANS SOMETHING... Anyway, that usually entails me running out of whatever domicile I'm in and escaping through a network of backyards, invariably bordered by fences that I have to scramble up and over like a monkey who just stole your Nachos (NACHO CHEESE!). I don't know what the deal is with them but there they are.

There are probably other recurring elements in my dreams but fuck it if I'm gonna tell you, you'll have to pay for the platinum subscription for that.

Anyway, if you are a dreamer, you should definitely try to remember your shit because they can, if nothing else, provide interesting thought fodder if you ever want to write a story or some shit.







I got nothing else. You should probably go home now.