Are you mental?

(Recent events have caused me to think in a slihtly English accent. That may bleed over into my writing. Do not be alarmed.)

One of the things that most fascinates me is psychosis. Mental illness. Being BOOOOONKERRRRRRRRS. I'm pretty sure the general reason is because I can imagine what it's like to be totally doffed. I like to think I have a strong imagination, so being able to channel nutsoids is, I think, a gift, because I get all the benefits of their different perspective of reality without all the trauma that goes along with it.

Why am I writing this? Because pretty soon you won't need to imagine what it's like to be a psycho. It'll be the reality. Yes, you guessed it, it's another POLITICAL BLOG ENTRY.

Delaware (remember them?) pulled a funny on Tuesday and nominated a proto-cat lady named Christine O'Donnell to the Republican ticket to the Senate seat once held by Joe "Joseph" Biden, the current Napper in Chief.

Don't know who Christine O'Donnell is? Well, in a nutshell, she is fucking nuts. Maybe she's not out and out psychotic, but she is certainly of below-average intelligence and probably very paranoid (they and anti-social types are the only people I'm sure I can spot a mile away). (Yes I am a doctor. A doctor of LOVE.) A more succinct description of what the hell is happening in Delaware can be found in this cute video:



That's just Delaware. The crazies have been crawling out of the woodwork all over, though, from Arizona's Jan Brewer claiming that drug dealers are beheading people out in the desert (they're not; those are just oddly shaped cactuses), to Sharron Angle in Nevada who thinks that social security is literally the devil. Literally. The devil. She thinks social security has cloven hooves and horns and answers to the name "Jay Leno."

New York, supposedly a bastion of LIBRULISM, is not immune. The GOP's candidate for governor is a delightful chap named Carl Paladino, a connoisseur of bestiality porn, among other wonderful subjects. Yup, opposing Andrew Cuomo is a guy who loves forwarding the kind of e-mails you get from grampy about that silly Negroid in the White House, and of horsedick.mpg. No confirmation yet that he has seen goatse, though, but I bet it'd be right up his alley.

Like syphilis, the Teabagger scourge is spreading from sea to oil-filled sea. There's no end in sight. We all hoped it'd be a temporary thing that would dissipate with the passage of the health care thing, but true madness does not respond to reality. Well, not in the way it's supposed to. Crazy people are wonderful in that any bit of contradiction just confirms how right they are. It's rare that nutty people have a House-like epiphany where they realize they do need help.

Am I saying that the country is actually spiraling towards collective psychosis? I'm not sure. I don't know if the people pushing the buttons of the Teabaggers are likewise true believers. My experience with such people tells me that the big shots could go either way.

If you had to know one thing about the United States, it's that it's really controlled by interests. Not people (although interests are of course made up of people). Interests. Semi-conscious entities. Any group of people is an interest: nations, guilds, unions, companies, Mickey Mouse Club chapters, ESL classes, Nose-picker Brigades, etc. The interests that control the U.S. are almost exclusively business in nature, not voters or any silly shit like that. And if it's one thing businesses love (aside from junkets to the Luxor), it's stability.

A quick glance at U.S. history rather proves that out. Even at the height of the Cold War, America's business class could reliably come down on the side of not being fucking retarded, even if many businessmen were crazed anti-communists willing to nuke the planet to get rid of the Reds. Verifiable shits like Nixon, Johnson, Reagan, Ford and Bush I, no matter how much of jerkfaces they were, would never let the country be destroyed or let its people be destroyed. So you were okay to feel safe with them.

(Although Reagan was probably probably borderline as he also had a nasty habit of swinging the country towards nuclear war with the Soviets, though he probably had no idea that he was doing that.)

(Also Clinton doesn't count because the Soviets were kaput and the U.S. was not seriously challenged by any foreign entity on his watch so he had no opportunity to seriously try something stupid. I don't think he would have, though.)

9/11 of course happened and Everything Changed™. In the wake of that, we have two reactions. America's business class have become more belligerent and willing to do risky shit to chase a buck. In this case, risky shit means whipping people up into frenzies, quietly stoking or tolerating violent rhetoric against convenient targets, and convincing people that they must accept a lower standard of living. This actually makes sense if you look at everything in a certain way, but that's a whole nother blog post and I'm 52.75% sure you are not that interested in it.

The other reaction, of course, comes from average Americans, who have become more paranoid and prone to bizarre suggestion. 20% of Americans think he is a Muslim (and 43% just don't plain know what he is). You could say that they're being fed misinformation (or disinformation??) from the media, thus leading them to the wrong conclusions. At a certain point, though, if you keep telling a person the sky is puke green, and they come to believe it, they're just plain fucking retarded.

This is not really a pleasant thing to experience, the slow crazifying of the country. This is almost certainly going to lead to violence because like Buzz, we're not that lucky. I don't know what the end game will be, but I do know the people who are whipping this shit into action are looking at an end game where most American citizens are no better off than the wage slaves in third-world countries, while the elites live high on the hawg.

The funny thing is that may not happen at all. Crazy people have a habit of being a tad bit unpredictable, even when you can tell what they're thinking. Who knows? Maybe the Teabaggers will back down at the moment of truth. Maybe they will get bored and chase after something else. Maybe they will decide that violent revolution will be the answer. Of course, the Teabaggers are not a monolothic entity, but their driving craziness is pretty uniform.

If we are that lucky, though, hopefully they will simply lose, give up, and take to the typewriter to warn us of our impending danger from the Gangster Computer God Worldwide Secret Containment Policy.